‘It doesn’t matter how poor quality the disciple may be: it matter only that he believe implicitly. For a germ to sprout, some other person, some one individual out of the crowd, has to show faith’. (Sexus, p 28)

Who has this been for me?

Lindsay when we wrote ‘The French Test’. Katherine when I was setting up ‘Last Stand Video’. Vicki  when I was composing ballads and singing – and now Richard with ‘The French Test’. (Spot the problem with this one, he is male).

For a time Joanna (and her kids) have inspired me with ‘Little Green Hannah’ and ‘Little Red Jake’. Who could be such a disciple? Annette –because the was she read ‘Henry and June;’ even Rebecca. Who else do I know who has tried, or is trying, to struggle with the same task.

‘Artists, like great religious leader show amazing perspicacity in this respect. They never pick the likely one for their purpose, but always some obscure, frequently ridiculous person’. (Sexus, p 28)

Who then? The choice must be theirs not mine, one which judges their enthusiasm, not their academic merit or related experience – a graduate wanna-be agent.

And Miller goes on, leading the way to Anais Nin who clearly made the writer:

‘What aborted me in my beginning, what almost proved to be a tragedy, was that I could find no one who believed in me implicitly, either as a person or as a writer, someone outside the vicious circle of fake admirers and envious denigrators’. (Sexus, p28)

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